I'll be posting soon! =)
Make sure to stop back by for a new true story!
-Justice
Twitter: https://twitter.com/HelpSaveJustice
Monday, November 17, 2014
Sunday, November 16, 2014
If He Hits You Once, He'll hit...
I’m still 17, and Slim is still my boyfriend. We
have our good days, but the bad days outweigh the good days…unfortunately. I
have just finished up my shift at work, and I’m beyond tired. I was at school
earlier for 7 long, drawn out hours. After school was over I had to punch the
clock until 9:00 pm. Slim asked me to come over after I got off of work; I didn’t
mind since he lived right down the street from my job.
I’m actually happy to see Slim, but once I arrive at
his house I can tell that he has been drinking. He begins to play too rough,
and I can sense that he is probably going to hit me if I say the wrong thing.
His guy friends come over, and his family is cooking…they’re
having a great time!
Well, I’m tired and Slim decides to take my food
that I brought home from work. I’m really not in the mood to play, so I just
give up and let him have it. Slim then picks up the keys to my car, and walks
out of the house. I begin to cry because I’m tired, and I know that if I try to
get them, then he will most definitely hit me.
I sit down on the couch, and I begin to cry. Slim’s
grandmother comes into the living room, and she asks me why I’m crying. I break
down and I tell her that Slim has taken my keys and my car. She goes to the
door, sticks her head outside, and begins to yell at Slim, “give Justice her
keys!” I’m still sitting on the couch waiting for Slim to bring my keys back;
when all of a sudden I see Slim through the storm door.
He walks into the house and throws the keys directly
into my face. I was soooooo tired of him disrespecting me! I jumped up to
attempt to fight back. Slim, who is 6’10”, punches me in my eye, grabs me by my
neck, and slams me into the floor!
At this point Slim’s sisters are crying, and his
grandmother is standing close by me watching. I could tell that she was scared, but what
was she going to do? She was older, and it was no way that she could help me.
Slim has walked out of the house, and his grandmother is helping me up. I look
over, and one of his sisters is standing behind the door crying and watching
the entire incident. I grab my keys, my purse, and I walk out of the house to
my car.
As I’m walking to my car I see one of Slim’s friends.
He has a look on his face as if he feels sorry for me. I felt bad for myself.
Slim is calling my phone telling me to bring him his belongings. I
agree to take them to him, but I’m smart enough not to go by myself. I bring
along my friend Whitney. She notices that my eye is starting to bruise a little…I
look in the mirror, but I’m not surprised by it.
Whitney pulls into Slim’s driveway, and she rolls
down the window. One of Slim’s friends begins to walk towards the car to grab
the belongings. A few seconds go by, and I see Slim walking out of the house,
and towards my friend’s car. I begin to yell, “Reverse! Reverse! GO!” …my
friend throws the belongings out of the window, and throws the car into
reverse.
We were on the main street, and I was so happy to be
dodging Slim’s fist.
I get a phone call from Slim’s house number; it’s
Slim’s mother calling me. “Justice, are you okay?”
…how did she know what happened? She wasn’t at home
when the hitting incident occurred.
Apparently, Slim’s grandmother told her what happened,
and what he had done to me. Slim’s mother tried her best to get me to call the
police, but I was too afraid to do so. Slim always told me that if I ever
called the police, then he would beat me again. I knew that he was not
lying to me…
I feared him.
I told her that I was okay, and she soon caught on
that I was not going to call the police. I was down emotionally, physically,
and spiritually =( The only person that I could call on was God. I couldn’t
tell my parents; I was under age at the time, and I wanted to be loved.
Never, ever, EVER, EVER let a man put his hands on
you. A man should make you feel safe, protected, and loved…never down. The only
man that one should fear is God!
If you are a teen and in an abusive relationship
PLEASE tell someone! No woman, especially a young lady, should have to endure
domestic violence. I know what it feels like emotionally, let alone,
physically; it’s not a great feeling. You will be so much happier once you rid
yourself of your abusive “partner”. I PROMISE! You are beautiful, you are special! ...EMBRACE IT! =)
-Justice“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life, but define yourself.” -Harvey Fierstein
Twitter: https://twitter.com/HelpSaveJustice
Saturday, November 15, 2014
Stripper Lifestyle
I’m struggling on my own and I am at a very low point in my life! I’m trying my best to
not have to borrow money from my mom nor dad. I need fast money, and I need it
now.
What faster way to get money? …dance.
It runs in my family, and I’m not oblivious to the “stripper
world”. I went to the strip club all the time with my male friends, and I viewed
it as art. It’s pretty cool, with the exception of taking my clothes off in
front of everyone. Mandy is a stripper, and she makes a lot of money.
I need a job, and I need it quick.
I need a job, and I need it quick.
I have known Mandy since high school; we’re 20 now.
She has multiple purses, shoes, a nice car, and plenty of money left over. I’m
wondering; how is she getting all of this money? The money was coming in too
fast to be legit money from a job. I need to know what she’s doing.
I get on Instagram and Mandy has posted some new
pictures. I notice the lockers in the background on a few of her pictures, so I
know she’s dancing in a strip club. I instantly leave my phone number on a
comment on one of Mandy’s pictures; I also tell her to call or text me. I want
in on the money…
Mandy calls me, and I begin to whisper; I don’t want
anyone knowing that I plan on stripping. She calls her boss, the owner of the
strip club, on 3-way. He doesn’t know that I’m on the phone also; he begins to
talk about his “sexual” business involving Mandy. She interrupts him, embarrassed,
and explains that I’m on the phone. Mandy tells her boss that she has a new
potential worker for him.
Boss Man then tells me that he has to see me before
he hires me; I agree to meet with him. He explains to me that I’m supposed to
have a license to dance…it’s a new law. He lets me know that the price for a license
to dance is sort of high, but he will let me work in the club until I make the money.
Illegal, I know right!
Well, Mandy has bought my bus ticket, and has
arranged for another stripper to pick me up from the bus station. I’m nervous,
but I’m ready to make some fast money to pay my bills.
I’m driving up the hill to get to my cousin’s
apartment. My cousin is a stripper, and a professional with the dance moves. She has
agreed to teach me everything that I need to know; from my first night dancing
to the newest moves. I walk into the room, and it’s another stripper there as
well…she’s there to teach me a few things also.
My cousin has bought me my first pair of dancing
heels, and a new outfit to go along with it. She begins to ask me why I wanted
to dance. I explain to her that I need the money for my bills, and for extra
money. She tells me that she’s not surprised; some women in our family have
done it, even her mom. She goes into the restroom, and comes back out a few
minutes later. She has changed into one of her “dancing outfits”.
She turns on some music, and she begins to dance.
She’s explaining to me at the same time what she is doing to her body, and
tells me to do it also. She tells me to keep my face serious, and continues to
show me different moves. She schools me and lets me know not to make friends in
the strip club. She also tells me to be careful with whom I dance with on
stage; some girls will steal your money bag when you’re not looking.
I never thought that I would be resorting to dancing
for money, but I was ready. I had my outfits, my heels, and I was an expert at
dancing after several lessons from my cousin. My cousin’s advice was, “Just
take 2 shots before you start; smoke a blunt, and you’ll be okay!” I believed
her…
And now I’m on the phone with the club owner. He has
asked me to send in pictures, and he has hired me. I have officially been hired
as a stripper at a strip club.
Mandy calls me, and asks me if I’m ready and packed
up. I have everything together, but I have butterflies. I had to catch the bus
since I was traveling to another state to dance; I didn’t want anyone at my
school to see me.
I choked up, and I missed the first bus. Mandy
schedules for me to catch another bus, and I’m nervous all over again!
…I can’t do it. I back out of the plan, and I tell
Mandy that I just can’t do it!
I thank God for not allowing me to make it on the
bus that day. Mandy ended up getting drugged by some random person, and she
hasn’t been the same since!
They say everything happens for a reason… =)
-Justice
This is what I knew. This is MY life. This is MY story.
"Nothing makes us more vulnerable than loneliness, except greed." -Thomas Harris
Justice Mayweather
I’ve just met my friend Melvin. He’s average height,
mixed, a body and neck full of tattoos, and beautiful hair. His family was
involved in the drug world, and lived an extravagant lifestyle. I met Melvin in
my friend’s neighborhood, and we had some of the same friends. We kicked it
everywhere and all of the time…even once got caught out late by the police.
It’s been a while now…Melvin and I have been
spending a lot of time together, and he becomes attractive to me…
and vice versa.
I’ve just gotten kicked out of my mom’s house, and I
could care less. I wasn’t going to beg to be able to come back home, so I was
staying with a few friends. I was 18 at the time.
I’m texting Melvin, and he says he wants to see me.
I tell him that he can come pick me up from my friend’s house. I’m standing
outside and he pulls up in an all-black Camaro. I get in and wave goodbye to my
friend…she knows where I’m going.
We pull up in front of Melvin’s house. I’m nervous
as hell…being that I hate meeting parents. I walk in and his mom is sitting at
the table watching television. I speak to her, “Hi! I’m Justice!” …his mom didn’t
respond to me. I began to get uncomfortable.
We proceed to walk up the stairs, and we walk by one
of his siblings…a female. I speak to her, and she doesn’t speak back to me.
I knew my visit with Melvin was not going to end too
well.
Melvin and I are now lying in the bed watching a
movie, and all of sudden someone starts calling his name. He mutes the
television, and begins to listen closely. I thought it was his mother; was I not
allowed in his room with the door closed? Someone then begins to knock on the
door…the knocks soon become heavy pounding. Melvin then jumps out of the bed,
and runs to the door. The pounding continues and Melvin starts to push against
the door, so that the door wouldn’t open. The pounding on the door becomes
kicks, and before you know it, the door was kicked in.
This girl comes running towards me! I immediately
jump up to fight the girl and defend myself. My mind is blank, and the only thing
I can think about is, “Beat this girl’s ass!”
The mattress is on the floor, and everything that
WAS on Melvin’s dresser is now on the floor. He’s trying to break the fight up, and
he finally gets me and the girl apart. I look towards the door and his mother
and siblings are all watching and smiling. The girl, who I was fighting, is
steadily trying to fight again, and I’m just ready to go home.
Why was this happening to me? Who was this girl? …and
why did she want to fight me?
…I had no idea what was going on! But I knew I was
tired of life, and ready to go back to my friend’s house.
I get my belongings together, and I check the mirror
to make sure my face looks fine. I ask Melvin to take me home, and I begin to
walk towards the car. We both put on our seatbelts, and he begins to try and
explain. I was so tired of men by the age of 18, so I was not trying to hear
anything he had to say. I asked him to drop me off down the street, and I
walked the rest of the way to my friend’s house.
Come to find out…the girl who I was fighting with was
Melvin’s pregnant girlfriend. I didn’t know anything about her, and apparently
she knew nothing about me. Melvin’s sister called her while she was away at
work, and she came to his mom’s house when she found out I was there. Melvin had a girlfriend the ENTIRE time, and
the bad thing about it is…she was living with him and his family at the time.
Melvin continued to try to communicate with me, but
I knew that it wasn’t worth my time. I mean, who wants to have to deal with doors
being kick in, and fighting all of the time? The entire time he lied to me
about NOT having a girlfriend, and I never knew that he was expecting a baby.
I learned that a man will lie, lie, and lie…and will
lie again if you let him. I also learned that if a MOTHER does not acknowledge
you in her house…get out! LOL! If I would have left when I noticed the
rudeness, then I probably would have avoided a fight. But hey, we all have to
live and learn!
-Justice
"You're going to go through tough times - that's life. But I say, 'Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.' See the positive in negative events." -Joel Osteen
Friday, November 14, 2014
Self Love VS Vitiligo
Vitiligo
: A condition in which the pigment is lost from
areas of the skin, causing whitish patches, often with no clear cause.
I was born with Vitiligo on my leg and I hated it.
…My mom has just finished combing my hair and I’m sitting on her lap. I’m 5 years old, and I’m crying because I don’t want to start school because of my leg. The kids will tease me, and I know it. My cousins and siblings have been teasing me ever since I was younger…they called me the worse names. I felt so ugly.
I asked my mom why I had vitiligo on my leg. She told me, “God made you special!” I immediately became happy. I was ready for my first day at school!
My mom has dropped me off at school, and now I’m
alone. The kids are staring at my leg, and pointing. I go behind the book shelf
to hide, and I begin to cry. No one wanted to play with me because I was different…I
was unique. Before I knew it, a girl and a boy walked up to me, and asked if I
wanted to play. They became my usual group of friends at school. I still remember them.
I’m on the phone calling my dad. I’m about 6 years
old at this point, and once again crying. I’m telling my dad that I don’t feel
pretty because the kids have been laughing at my leg. I also tell him that my
siblings have been calling me ugly because of my leg. He tells me, “You are
beautiful! Don’t let anyone tell you that you’re not beautiful! And knock that boy
out at school tomorrow!” …and I’m not lying when I say the next day was my
first fight! …yep, right on the playground! LOL!
What else was a father suppose to tell his daughter?
He taught me how to defend myself, and I’ve been doing it ever since.
I’m in middle school now, and the teasing has gotten
worse. When they say kids can be the meanest…they aren’t lying. The kids are
afraid to play with me. They think that if they touch my leg, then my vitiligo
will spread onto them. This most definitely isn’t the case…that’s impossible.
My family even teases me; once upon a time telling me that I had “shit” on my
leg.
Luckily, rolling backpacks have come out. I use it
to cover my leg as I walk in the hallway. I hated my leg at this point. I was
tired of the teasing! I was normal, and no other child could see that, except
for me. Adults would even stare and point. I knew I was different, and people
weren’t afraid to tell me.
I’m in the 8th grade now, and gym
attendance is required. I’m in the coach’s office trying to get permission to
wear long pants instead of gym shorts, since I hate showing my leg. He tells me
that I can wear long pants, but I have to do my exercises in gym shorts. I was
more than happy! I didn’t have to show my leg!
Back then, I didn’t understand why he made me work
out in my gym shorts. Now that I’m older, I realize that my coach made me wear
my shorts to “prepare” me for this cruel world. He allowed me to be comfortable
enough in gym class, but still made me go through showing my leg. Then and
there, I became better at dealing with my vitiligo.
I’m in high school now. 14 years old, and I’m still
hiding my leg in public. Whether it was the store, school, or the neighborhood…I
never allowed anyone to see my leg. I was embarrassed of it. I thought my leg was ugly
and I wasn't comfortable with showing my leg off to anyone.
I’ve just gotten on the school bus
in a skirt, but I don’t have the confidence enough to walk the school hallways
in it. By the time first period was starting…I was in the restroom changing
into a pair of jeans that I bought with me; just in case I chickened out.
I’m in my freshman year of college, and I still hide
my leg! It hasn’t been a party that I’ve worn a dress or a skirt to. I’m still
too nervous to show it in public, and I’m 18 years old.
Well, it’s Halloween and it’s time to pick costumes.
I can’t find a costume that’s sexy, and will still hide my leg at the same time!
What was I going to do? I couldn’t look
like a child inside of the party. So, one of my friends suggested something
with fishnets. It was the most brilliant idea ever! I found a cute, sexy
costume that still looked great with fishnets. I felt beautiful…I felt sexy!
For the first time ever…I wasn’t worried about if someone would stare and
comment about my vitiligo on my leg.
I am now 24 years old, and I have finally embraced
my vitiligo. I am no longer afraid, embarrassed, nor worried about what others
have to say about my leg. I am happy, I am breathing, and I am unique.
Self-love is the best love!
"I think the most important thing in life is self-love, because if you don't have self-love, and respect for everything about your own body, your own soul, your own capsule, then how can you have an authentic relationship with anyone else?" -Shailene Woodley
-Justice
This is MY life. MY story.
Hi There!!
I will be posting a new story from my life later on today! =)
Make sure to spread the link!
A life...or even a broken heart can be saved!
-Justice
"Good words are worth much, and cost little." -George Herbert
Thursday, November 13, 2014
Losing My Innocence
I’m 15 years old, and I’m dating one of the biggest
drug dealers…also, one of the biggest “game talkers”. He’s 19 about to be 20…and
he comes with a baby and a psycho baby momma. Not that I care; he’s funny and
cute as hell. His name is Brian.
Brian has just asked for me $25. I’m 15 and jobless,
but I leave it in the mailbox for him to pick up. Now that I look back on it;
he had the money…he just wanted to see where I was mentally.
..and I was nowhere near prepared for what was about
to happen.
Just last year I was having my first kiss. That didn’t
go so well…the boy stopped talking to me after I wouldn’t have sex with him.
Just great, huh? Well, I’ve met Brian and he has sweet talked me into letting
him come over when my parents were at work. It was a school holiday, and he
came over that morning. I made him park his car down the street…I wasn’t trying
to get caught by my parents.
I let him into the house, and I honestly had the
time of my life with him…it was so much fun. I continued to see Brian all of
the time. Even purposely going to my grandmother’s house, waited for her to
pass out drunk, and then would call Brian to come pick me up. I would then
sneak back into my grandmother’s house…I knew it wouldn’t be until morning that
she recovered from the vodka and cranberry juice.
Brian comes over one day; my family went to an event
together, and I stayed home just to sneak him in. He begins to kiss me, and
before you know it…I’m losing my virginity. He leaves, and I immediately call
my best friend, Amanda, to tell her the big news. Now I tell Amanda EVERYTHING,
and I tell her about my experience in detail. She is also 15, and has already
lost her virginity to Brian’s close friend; that’s how I met Brian.
Well, some days go by, and I haven’t heard from
Amanda. She wouldn’t answer my phone calls or anything. I get online to check Myspace,
and I notice that Brian is in her top 5 friends. Back then, that was MAJOR on
Myspace. I then noticed that his pictures were on her page, and also his name
on the background.
Did I miss something? Why in the hell was that on
her page?
I rushed to call Brian, and he’s laughing. I asked
him why her Myspace page had his pictures on there, and he told me, “I f&cked
Amanda”. I told him to stop playing, and he told me that he was serious…he then
hung up in my face. I immediately called Amanda, and she confirmed that she had
sex with Brian. She also told me that Brian told her that I had been saying
negative things about her, which I wasn’t doing.
I hung up the phone, and I began to scream. The
tears began pouring down my face. I had never felt so hurt…so betrayed. My mom
heard me crying, and asked me what was wrong. I explained to her that Amanda
had sex with Brian. My mom knew that Amanda was my best friend, and she also
knew that Brian had just taken my virginity. It had only been a week since I
lost my virginity, and I felt like my world was over. I didn’t understand why
my “friend” would do that to me.
My mom looked at me and the only thing she said was,
“…and you know what? She’ll never be happy because of the way she got him!” She
told me that I didn’t have friends; that she was my best friend.
Those were her only and exact words. She was right,
and she’s still right ‘til this day.
I learned that everyone isn’t your friend…everyone
does not care about your feelings. People will do what THEY want to do, and
that’s just a part of life. Friends come and friends go…some “friends”, some would
say snakes, will betray you.
I learned that lesson at 15 years old, and I will
never forget it.
As far as Amanda, Brian left her after about a week
and a half. I haven’t talk to her since then. Brian was still full of himself…he
would call me from restricted and say, “You wish you had my new number” … he would
eventually give me the new number, and then change the number again. This broke
my heart, and it was a repetitive cycle until I snapped out of stupid. All
thanks to my mother =)
The next time I spoke with Brian was on my 18th
birthday. He got in touch with me, and apologized for the cruel things that he
did to me when I was younger. He took me to J. Alexander’s for my 18th
birthday, and ended my night with giving me a bankroll of money…$300. I guess
that was his way of making it up to me, but I will always remember what he did
to me.
Mothers, keep uplifting your daughter(s), nieces,
students, neighbors…we all need a little preaching in our lives every now and
then =) I’m glad that my mother was there for me in my time of need…I probably
wouldn’t have made it without her nor without her words. She knew exactly how I
felt, since she went through it before.
I also learned that men will be men, and the vagina
does not have a name on it. I learned to not give myself away to just anyone. I
also learned that you can’t introduce everyone to your boyfriend; and if you
feel that way, then he shouldn’t be your boyfriend. =)
Let’s be smart ladies, and for the gents…you might
have a daughter one day; maybe a niece or a God daughter. Watch how you treat
women/young ladies; treat her with the same respect as you would want someone
to treat your mother, grandmother, or daughter.
Come on now, we depend on each other =)
-Justice
“Everyone suffers at least one bad betrayal in their lifetime. It’s what unites us. The trick is not to let it destroy your trust in others when that happens. Don’t let them take that from you.” -Sherrilyn Kenyon
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
You Are....
"Sometimes you've got to let everything go - purge yourself. If you are unhappy with anything... whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you'll find that when you're free, your true creativity, your true self comes out." -Tina Turner
Stupid In Love
I am older now. I’m sitting on the passenger side of
the car, and my boyfriend is driving. I’m 21 years old, finally. We’re in love
and I had never been a size 0 in my entire life...until then. That was sarcasm
once again. He’s yelling and before you know it I was being called a bitch. I
was use to it though. That was in his top 3 for the names he would call me when
he was mad. Don’t get me wrong; this isn’t the man I thought I had fallen in
love with. Once upon a time, he was the prince charming I had always longed
for. We believed we loved each other, but love doesn’t hit you.
You would think by now that I would have it together
with men. It’s a year after my rape and I have finally met someone that I am
not afraid to be around. He makes me happy and I’m comfortable with him. He
understands me…and knows about my past that drags behind me. I’m not afraid to
kiss him, touch him, be affectionate, nor love him; the feeling is amazing. I
loved him. He loved me.
See, my friend never liked my boyfriend. She didn’t
like the way he would treat me. I had
always told my friend that I was afraid of him after the verbal abuse got so
bad. I even made a video just in case something happened to me…I wanted my
family to know who was responsible. (I showed my friend the video after the
hitting incident), and once again she began to tell me that I needed to leave
him. She told me that I deserved better and I didn’t deserve to be treated that
way. And you know what? I finally left.
I was so tired of getting abused in my life. Why was
this happening to me again? Why can’t a man be nice to me? What is wrong with
me? Those were the types of questions going through my mind…Just remember that you are a survivor! Stronger than you can imagine =) Some people are just placed in our lives to strengthen us…believe it or not.
You never know whose life you can impact with your words. If you see a friend in trouble…help that friend. Sometimes we can be so in love that we make excuses for our partner. In this case, my excuses became beyond old for him. As any woman out there we have to stay strong, and for the men…control those tempers, hands, and protect us women. =)
"Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it's all over." -Octavia Butler
Hi There =)
MY life. MY stories.
-Justice
"We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot." -Eleanor Roosevelt
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
Helpless Romantic
My
mom has just been dragged into the front room by her hair…her boyfriend wanted
to look at himself in the mirror. She was in the shower, but not anymore. I’m
young and confused
…and
I’m in her closet reading the hidden journal entries in her secret hiding
place. I’m around 11 years old…maybe 12. I’m not surprised…he’s evil to her.
Lies, cheats, and hurts her…but I think he loves her. He has put a gun to her
head, calls her out of her name, hits her, and makes her feel anything, but
beautiful. I always knew my mom was beautiful, but I didn’t know what all she
had been through. I didn’t know her life was like mine.
She
loved this man and she gave him 5 children. Anyone on the outside looking in
would never know what was truly going on, but I knew.
My
mom was sitting on the end of the bed…in pain. She asked me and another sibling
to rub her legs…they were bruised severely. I never knew what really happened
that day, but I knew it was dealing with her boyfriend. I don’t know which memory is worse…that or the
time I was 5 years old staring at him as he belittled her and she was in tears.
I ran back into my room crying. I was 5 and I knew something was wrong. My mom
came into my room, kneeled down, and looked into my eyes. “Do I have a black
eye?” she asked. I replied, “No.” My mom then said, “Well, then he didn’t hit
me.” My tears stopped and she tucked me back into bed. That was only the
beginning…
I’m
14 now and my mom has hidden the laptop from me. She was frustrated because I
kept creating social media pages after she kept telling me not to. Hard headed
was my middle and first name. She was at work and I knew her boyfriend wouldn’t
be there for a while…considering that he was a hoe. I broke into her room and
began to look for the laptop, but I found something else…my mom’s clothes
packed up in garbage bags. Who did this? I tied the bags back up and locked the
door behind me. I don’t think it was meant for me to run across the bags that
were full of clothes, but I did.
I knew there would be war when my mom got
home.
She
pulls into the drive way and she’s talking on her cell phone through her
headset. I walk out of my room after a while just to see how she’s doing. She’s
pissed and going off on the phone! “He’s gonna put my shit back up!” …I knew he
wouldn’t though. I walk in to help her fold her clothes, and I have created a
stack of nicely folded shirts. As I pull the dresser drawer open to put her
clothes inside…I notice that her boyfriend has left SEVERAL condoms in her
dresser drawers. How can a person be so evil to someone so sweet? What had she
done to him? Simply nothing.
…that’s
all I can really remember from that crazy life event, but I felt so bad for my
angel, my mother. She was so strong and determined to keep her family together.
Why she chose to endure it? …I have no idea! But no matter what, I will NEVER
stand for domestic abuse, and neither should you.
If
you know anyone that is going through domestic abuse, please encourage them to
leave. You can save a life and bring on a change like no other…your few words
can make a difference.
This
is what I knew, this was my life, and this is my story.
-Justice“The more a daughter knows the details of her mother's life [...] the stronger the daughter.” - Anitas Diamant, The Red Tent
Monday, November 10, 2014
Beat My Heart...
I’m
in the bathroom crying and my wrist is killing me. I’m on the floor in cradle
position with the door locked. My boyfriend had just beaten me. You see, I was
16 years old…dating a 21 year old man. Shocked? Not at all. He was brown skin,
6’10”, and went by the nickname Slim. I met Slim at my new job working in the
drive thru. I’m not sure if he knew my real age at first, but I vividly remember
telling him as he slid his number to me on a receipt. He always came up to my
job to stare…he ordered food sometimes, but for the most part he stared and
smiled.
The
gifts began flowing in. There were flowers, teddy bears, and Bath & Body
works, not to mention the male attention, and many other gifts. I felt like the
luckiest girl…never thinking about the age difference. All of my friends knew
who I was dating…some of my friends were even dating his friends. (That’s
usually how young male whores set it up to be). Any who, I was in lust and I
thought I was happy.
I
would do anything to see Slim. I would lie about being at work or say that I was
at a friend’s house just to see him. My parents didn’t know he existed, but his
family was okay with me being around. ‘Til this day I don’t know if he lied to
them about my age or if his family was just ignorant. Whatever the case may be…I
shouldn’t have been with Slim.
Slim
had just gone through my cell phone. He claimed that it was a text from another
boy dealing with money. This was an entire lie. I tried to explain to him what
the text was, but he had already lost his temper. Before I knew it, Slim had
slammed my cell phone into the wall. From instinct, I jumped up to try to get
my phone. Slim then picked up a metal rod and began to swing at me. He held me
down and repeatedly hit me with the rod. I ended up spraining my wrist from
trying to block the blows. I finally got away and locked myself inside of the
bathroom. His brother knocked on the door to check on me…I told him I was okay,
but he knew I was in severe pain. After about 20-30 minutes, I felt like it was
safe enough for me to leave out of the bathroom. Slim was lying across the bed…acting
as if nothing had just happen.
I
had a car then and I began to look for my purse and keys so that I could leave.
You know what Slim decides to do? He grabbed my huge purse and emptied it into
the middle of the street. I couldn’t believe that this was happening to me. What
did I do to him to deserve this? What do I do? I can’t tell my parents because I’m
underage. I felt like I had to hide what was really happening to me.
I
was 16 in an abusive relationship with a 21 year old man who was beating me.
The abuse was verbal, physical, and emotional. He brought me to one of my
lowest points…and worse of all…I didn’t feel beautiful.
Should
I stay? Why not? …my mom does…is what I was thinking at the time.
I
went back to the relationship & it wasn’t the last time Slim beat me up.
Let’s just say, there were black eyes.
…Never
let a man bring you down. You are beautiful, a pearl, and most definitely
special. If a man truly loves you, then he will never harm you or result to
putting his hands on you. Men should protect women…not harm them. I believe
that at the time Slim knew that what he was doing to me was wrong, but I think
he also knew that he broke me down so low, that I would be stupid and come
back.
“No
one else will want you!” is what he would tell me, and I believed it.
Some
of you are princess; others are queens, but no matter the age…NEVER stand for
domestic violence. If he hits you once, then he will MOST DEFINITELY hit you
again! Leaving that abusive partner is hard, but so much worth it in the end!
You will actually enjoy not having to:
- Be afraid that you will tick off your abusive partner
- Hide the facts from your family
- Get bruised up
- Feel like you were in a car accident the next day
- Feel unpretty (Believe me when I say...you are beautiful!)
- Avoid being who you really are in front of your partner
You
are strong and you can leave. No feeling of “false” love is worth being abused.
There is love and support everywhere: family, friends, classmates, blog sites,
EVERYWHERE.
Believe
me when I say that if a man loves you, then he will never hit you. IT’S THE
TRUTH! I’m so happy that I became strong enough to leave…and so can you, you
pearl! =)
-Justice“She could just pack up and leave, but she does not visualize what's beyond ahead.” - Núria Añó
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