MY life. MY stories. : My Mother's Pain

I am standing between them. It’s him and her fighting, and I heard the yelling from outside. I have come inside the house because it’s my mom’s voice that I hear.

The table is broken, there are holes in the wall, and cracked picture frames on the floor. I run to stand in front of my mom; maybe I can protect her. I’m 16, and I’m crying. Why her? I begin to yell at him in her defense. He’s standing there…looking at me in anger. He’s trying to keep his composure in front of me, but I know he wants to hurt her. He walks away and my mom gets inside of her car. I look outside of the window while the tears roll down my face as she drives away.

I’m constantly calling my mother’s cell phone, but she continues not to answer. As I look back on it…maybe she was on the phone with her mother. I knew she was sad. I would pray every night that he wouldn’t drive her crazy to the point to where she would give up…on life that is. She continued to stay strong, but I can’t imagine the pain she was feeling.

I’m sitting in class, and a woman with brown hair walks in. I’m in the 4th grade now, and I’m shocked when she walks up to my desk. I never get in trouble at school (at this age). I notice her from the front office; she works at the administrative desk at my school. The lady kneels down, and begins to whisper to me. She tells me that my mom will not be picking me up from school. She explains to me that my aunt will be picking me up instead. I didn’t understand why my mom was not picking me up. I was always a “car rider” and my mom was always the one to come and get me.

It’s 3:00 PM and school lets out. I get into the forming class line, and we proceed to walk outside. All of the car riders had to stand in front of the school, and wait on their parent(s) to pick them up.

I finally see my aunt’s car pull into the front of my school, and I begin to head towards her car. “Hey Justice!” I was happy to see her, but I was upset. My mom would normally stop somewhere to get a snack on the way home, but my aunt was going to take me straight to the house.

She didn’t say anything about my mother while we were in the car. We listened to music and harmonized with each other the entire ride home.

I begin to see an ambulance’s flashing lights and multiple police car lights flashing also. As my aunt continues to drive down the street I see that the flashing lights are right outside of my house. My aunt pulls into the drive way, and I walk down the sidewalk to the front of the house. I see my mom’s boyfriend strapped onto a stretcher.

I looked at his face, and he could only move his eyes…nothing else. He couldn’t move one muscle.

I turned away to walk inside of the house, and my mother is standing by the door. She seemed to be unbothered by everything that was going on. My mom didn’t say anything about her boyfriend to me, but I knew she did something to him.

I knew whatever she did to him was in self-defense. To be honest, I’m happy that she decided to stand up for herself. I was proud of her!

I know that sometimes we can be so in love that we become blind. We sometimes will even make ourselves believe that it is our fault, which is completely false. Whether it is a mother, a son, or a grandfather…no one deserves to be abused. Abuse comes in multiple forms, and the results from any type of abuse can be very traumatic.

If you are in an abusive relationship PLEASE do not continue to be silent about it. Harboring those types of feelings can bring you down in a drastic way…especially mentally. Whether it is telling a close friend, a teacher, a sibling, or your journal…let those feelings out and express yourself.

If you feel as if you can’t walk away right now…just know that you are more than able. Your love is enough to fulfill your own happiness =) It is all in building your mental and emotional strength.

Everything happens for a reason. God makes no mistakes and I assure you of that! You are a soldier, and you will become stronger than you ever imagined. Your life is what YOU make of it! This is YOUR life…write your own story.

Don’t let anyone ruin your spirit! If I can make it…you can also! =)

This is MY life. This is MY story.

-Justice